holy shit my fake boyfriend is gay.
so i was thinking a lot lately on how perceptions of situations and people are usually different than reality. even when you get to know someone for real, does the perception of that person really ever go away. take for instance, my crush (and apparenrtly imaginary boyfriend). in my head, hes perfect. he's cute, hes funny, witty and smart. when i first met him, i didnt get a chance to know him at all. he was just a really cute kid who was super polite and sweet. so obvi my mind ran with it and he clearly became the perfect candidate for my next crush target.
natutally, since ive only seen this kid three time as of now, my mind has wandered and he has become perfect. however, after spending a considerable amount of time with him this past week a few things occured to me. one of which is that i think he might be gay.
in my mind, he's cute and witty. in reality hes cute and borderline tooly. in my mind, he's funny and cool. in reality he's got a weird sense of humor (who doesn't like the soup?!!) and has homosexual tendencies. even if hes not gay, hes definitely a little bitch. however the thing that gets me most, is the fact that even knowing all of this, when i think about him, i think all the fake stuff! like how hes the perfect dude and how i need to manipulate him into being interested in me.
however, i think ive reached a turning point and in doing so, i think ive interestingly gained a lot of self confidence/awareness. i'm clearly cooler and funnier than he is and he would be fucking lucky if i gave him the time of day. now, i cant get ahead of myself and say that im a overall confident person, because we all know im not, but i think my fear of being rejected has been at least reduced from this incident...maybe?
bottom line: he's probably into dudes.
now this is a cool ass kid.
XOXO
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Sunday, January 3, 2010
shouldn't have left you, without a dope beat to step to...
its been a long time. i am suddenly re-inspired since talking with someone who recently started a blog. i realize no one will read this, and i think i might like it that way.
so much has happened in the last 7-8 months. now it is a complete blur, but so much really has gone down. im about to re-embark on busy season and after re-reading my past posts, i realize just how much time has past since the last one. i enjoyed the insight reading my thoughts from a year ago gave me though and i like the prospect of having that in the future as well, so here i am.
since i have an obessive compulsive personality, my current favorite thing is snowboarding. i usually obsess over the Xgames superpipe so this is no shock, but i'm so pumped for the olympic competition in feb. i also think im attracted to the type of boys who do extreme sports, so again, no shock to anyone reading this.
since my test has ended, ive felt a huge weight off my shoulders and huge shift in my personality. i think overall, im just a lot less emo than a year ago. i still love the music, but i def think im more a positive person in general. another big change from last year is my love of gg. no more do i look forward to it and i've moved on to bigger and better shows. my new obsession (re: ocd personality) is how i met your mother. i bought the dvds and have marathoned the shit out of them. so in case you havent caught on to one of the most brilliant series on tv, i offer you the following. the first (and best) single from Robin Sparkles entitled "Lets go to the mall". in my opinion, an instant classic.
that's it for now. i'm going to try to update regularly throughout busy season and beyond, since i'll need a break from my 12 hour days. thanks for listening.
xoxo
so much has happened in the last 7-8 months. now it is a complete blur, but so much really has gone down. im about to re-embark on busy season and after re-reading my past posts, i realize just how much time has past since the last one. i enjoyed the insight reading my thoughts from a year ago gave me though and i like the prospect of having that in the future as well, so here i am.
since i have an obessive compulsive personality, my current favorite thing is snowboarding. i usually obsess over the Xgames superpipe so this is no shock, but i'm so pumped for the olympic competition in feb. i also think im attracted to the type of boys who do extreme sports, so again, no shock to anyone reading this.
since my test has ended, ive felt a huge weight off my shoulders and huge shift in my personality. i think overall, im just a lot less emo than a year ago. i still love the music, but i def think im more a positive person in general. another big change from last year is my love of gg. no more do i look forward to it and i've moved on to bigger and better shows. my new obsession (re: ocd personality) is how i met your mother. i bought the dvds and have marathoned the shit out of them. so in case you havent caught on to one of the most brilliant series on tv, i offer you the following. the first (and best) single from Robin Sparkles entitled "Lets go to the mall". in my opinion, an instant classic.
that's it for now. i'm going to try to update regularly throughout busy season and beyond, since i'll need a break from my 12 hour days. thanks for listening.
xoxo
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
I came here to make you dance tonight...
Best. Concert. Ever.
went to FOB, Cobra, ATL, Fiddy concert this weekend and it was beyond awesome. i ser love going to shows and this one was top notch. everyone brought great stuff and the crowd was amazing too (except for the 14 year olds who love skylar). cobras were awesome (fangs up bitches) and FOB killed it (a great fucking set). honestly it was a great all around weekend. DC was fabulous and beautiful and hanging with the girls was amazing. wish i couldve stayed longer.... boltbus was awesome too tho-def take that shit again.
official workout plan begins this week and i'm determined. i have a brand new gym room in the basement and im super excited to use it and hopefully will.
audit exam is thurs and im super nervous. i just want these exams to be over with so i can have a partay and a normal life again. hopefully soon...
not much else to talk about. you would think since i havent been using this for awhile id have more to say, but my life really IS that dull.
XOXO
PS: Shush Girl
went to FOB, Cobra, ATL, Fiddy concert this weekend and it was beyond awesome. i ser love going to shows and this one was top notch. everyone brought great stuff and the crowd was amazing too (except for the 14 year olds who love skylar). cobras were awesome (fangs up bitches) and FOB killed it (a great fucking set). honestly it was a great all around weekend. DC was fabulous and beautiful and hanging with the girls was amazing. wish i couldve stayed longer.... boltbus was awesome too tho-def take that shit again.
official workout plan begins this week and i'm determined. i have a brand new gym room in the basement and im super excited to use it and hopefully will.
audit exam is thurs and im super nervous. i just want these exams to be over with so i can have a partay and a normal life again. hopefully soon...
not much else to talk about. you would think since i havent been using this for awhile id have more to say, but my life really IS that dull.
XOXO
PS: Shush Girl
Thursday, March 19, 2009
go shawty, its your bday...
dude its been forever.
anyway, so much has happened since last post. my city client sucks so bad, my senior is a blithering idiot and an ass and i'm majorly unhappy. i'm gonng see if i can get off of this asap. on the other hand, my favorite manager in the whole wide world left the firm today. i cant even describe how sad it is. i truly looked up to him and was completly looking forward to working with him even more. i totally cried when he told me that he was impressed because i respect him and his opinion so much.
OK. DUKE VS BING...um hello?! ive been dreaming of this matchup since i was in hs and OF COURSE it happens after i graduate. as much as i loved bing when i was there, duke has always been my team and i will be rooting for them tonight (esp since theres a potential nova matchup!!)
movies movies movies...saw watchmen, kinda loved it. didnt expect to, but did. cannot wait to see "i love you man" and "adventureland" either. allie also planned twilight saturday for this weekend, so ill be seeing that movie a few times then too.
50 cent is opening for fall out boy when i go see them in VA. huh? should be awesome tho. also, totally got my bus ticket for 2.50 roundtrip. boltbus mofos
XOXO
PS: lost is the best show out there so if you're not watching, i reccomend marathonning the shit out of it.
anyway, so much has happened since last post. my city client sucks so bad, my senior is a blithering idiot and an ass and i'm majorly unhappy. i'm gonng see if i can get off of this asap. on the other hand, my favorite manager in the whole wide world left the firm today. i cant even describe how sad it is. i truly looked up to him and was completly looking forward to working with him even more. i totally cried when he told me that he was impressed because i respect him and his opinion so much.
OK. DUKE VS BING...um hello?! ive been dreaming of this matchup since i was in hs and OF COURSE it happens after i graduate. as much as i loved bing when i was there, duke has always been my team and i will be rooting for them tonight (esp since theres a potential nova matchup!!)
movies movies movies...saw watchmen, kinda loved it. didnt expect to, but did. cannot wait to see "i love you man" and "adventureland" either. allie also planned twilight saturday for this weekend, so ill be seeing that movie a few times then too.
50 cent is opening for fall out boy when i go see them in VA. huh? should be awesome tho. also, totally got my bus ticket for 2.50 roundtrip. boltbus mofos
XOXO
PS: lost is the best show out there so if you're not watching, i reccomend marathonning the shit out of it.
Friday, February 27, 2009
attention, attention, may i have all your eyes and ears to the front of the room
i realized today that i have much more to write about when i'm in the city. so today i present you with...things seen and heard around NYC.
-i literally saw eric from gg in penn station last night. it was def him.he had the soft voice and when he noticed i noticed him he tried to hide his face. i laughed because REALLY?! eric from gossip girl...REALLY?!
-i saw an azn pose for a pic in front of msg with a peace sign. need i say more?
-old white guys with azn's give me the heebs. i dont know why,but they always do. weirdd.
-lirr is changing the times for march...REALLY lirr, REALLY?!
-i hate this client with a passion, its not fun, the people are boring and it's hard...can i go back to empress now please?
-i can see times square from the office, and strangely enough, i couldnt care less. i'm just happy because i can also see a sbux and a hale and hearty
-the man who handed me the newspaper this morning said "have a good day love". i immediately realized that i connected with the black man in the organge vest giving out papers because i call people love too.
XOXO
-i literally saw eric from gg in penn station last night. it was def him.he had the soft voice and when he noticed i noticed him he tried to hide his face. i laughed because REALLY?! eric from gossip girl...REALLY?!
-i saw an azn pose for a pic in front of msg with a peace sign. need i say more?
-old white guys with azn's give me the heebs. i dont know why,but they always do. weirdd.
-lirr is changing the times for march...REALLY lirr, REALLY?!
-i hate this client with a passion, its not fun, the people are boring and it's hard...can i go back to empress now please?
-i can see times square from the office, and strangely enough, i couldnt care less. i'm just happy because i can also see a sbux and a hale and hearty
-the man who handed me the newspaper this morning said "have a good day love". i immediately realized that i connected with the black man in the organge vest giving out papers because i call people love too.
XOXO
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
there's a drug in the thermostat to warm the room up...
no update in awhile so i figured why not now. its snowing, im stuck in westchester, and my team is made up of a belguim man, astrange girl and an awkward gay man (not the cool kind, the tool kind). so i'm making a list of random thoughts...
-my new favorite thing since im stuck in bumblefuck for the next week is mytraffic.com. it tells you the fastes route and how long its gonna take to get home. although because of the rain, i guarentee it will take FOREVER tonight. people forget how to drive in bad weather.
-i miss my old team/client. it was kinda the perfect 5 weeks. it was busy season but it was fun. weird.
-my test results for FAR are gonna be up any day now, i almost vom everytime i think about it.
-im almost excited to take the train for a few weeks. i think i have some my best (and most interesting) thoughts on the lirr. hopefully no one talks too loud sitting by me.
-incredibad is amazing. get it if you don't already have it (<3 andy samberg and co.)
-NY mag sex diaries are an amazing time filler when you work 12 hours a day. trust me, unfort i know.
-it's been noted that i make too many smiley faces in emails/texts. unfortunately that is prob 100% correct. i should stop being so happy :)
anyway, i think busy season has caused me to lose (i spelled it right!) a bit of my edge. my wit is gone (yeah yeah i know you are all saying "what wit"). but i feel like i can see the light at the end of the tunnel. hopefully soon busy season/exams will be over and it will be the best summer ever!
XOXO
-my new favorite thing since im stuck in bumblefuck for the next week is mytraffic.com. it tells you the fastes route and how long its gonna take to get home. although because of the rain, i guarentee it will take FOREVER tonight. people forget how to drive in bad weather.
-i miss my old team/client. it was kinda the perfect 5 weeks. it was busy season but it was fun. weird.
-my test results for FAR are gonna be up any day now, i almost vom everytime i think about it.
-im almost excited to take the train for a few weeks. i think i have some my best (and most interesting) thoughts on the lirr. hopefully no one talks too loud sitting by me.
-incredibad is amazing. get it if you don't already have it (<3 andy samberg and co.)
-NY mag sex diaries are an amazing time filler when you work 12 hours a day. trust me, unfort i know.
-it's been noted that i make too many smiley faces in emails/texts. unfortunately that is prob 100% correct. i should stop being so happy :)
anyway, i think busy season has caused me to lose (i spelled it right!) a bit of my edge. my wit is gone (yeah yeah i know you are all saying "what wit"). but i feel like i can see the light at the end of the tunnel. hopefully soon busy season/exams will be over and it will be the best summer ever!
XOXO
Monday, February 9, 2009
well i guess this is growing up...
ok so i totally watched the grammys last night and i have so much to say about it. first off, chris brown and alien princess riri. not cool. i dont care why, what or how he hit her, you dont ever hit a girl. poor alien princess. MK (dlisted.com) wrote this about the incident:
A source said that Ike and Tina '09 were fighting inside the car and RiRi got out to walk the fuck home. She probably said "shut up and drive" and he wouldn't (sorry). The source went on to say, "Things got physical. He hit her, possibly more than once. She had multiple bruises." RiRi's glorious tenhead better be pristine or I will never stick a piece of doublemint gum in my mouth again.
LOVE HIM.
anyway, in other huge news, blink is back. i know they aren't the best band in the world, but they are legends. without them, there would be no fall out boy or paramore and the entire genre of music that i love so much wouldnt exist the same way. james montgomery wrote a great article about them here. hes spot on about all of it. i saw blink play with no doubt 5 years ago, and considering that i MUST see no doubt this summer (its not an option, so whoever wants to go with me i will be forever grateful), i think would be fun to see blink again all these years later too.
seriously a great time for music all around.
XOXO
PS: i love andy samberg and the lonely island. i'm on a boat motherfucker
A source said that Ike and Tina '09 were fighting inside the car and RiRi got out to walk the fuck home. She probably said "shut up and drive" and he wouldn't (sorry). The source went on to say, "Things got physical. He hit her, possibly more than once. She had multiple bruises." RiRi's glorious tenhead better be pristine or I will never stick a piece of doublemint gum in my mouth again.
LOVE HIM.
anyway, in other huge news, blink is back. i know they aren't the best band in the world, but they are legends. without them, there would be no fall out boy or paramore and the entire genre of music that i love so much wouldnt exist the same way. james montgomery wrote a great article about them here. hes spot on about all of it. i saw blink play with no doubt 5 years ago, and considering that i MUST see no doubt this summer (its not an option, so whoever wants to go with me i will be forever grateful), i think would be fun to see blink again all these years later too.
seriously a great time for music all around.
XOXO
PS: i love andy samberg and the lonely island. i'm on a boat motherfucker
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